What It Will Mean If She Wins
In the early days of the American Revolution Abigail Adams wrote to her husband, John, “I long to hear that you have declared an independency. And, by the way…if particular care and attention is not paid to the ladies, we are determined to foment a rebellion.” Well, the American Revolution lasted nearly eight years and Abigail’s ladies’ “rebellion” has lasted nearly two-and-a-half centuries. And it’s still going on.
"My candle was nearly burnt out,
when, by the glimmer of the half-extinguished light,
I saw the dull yellow eye of the creature open."
~ Frankenstein, Chapter 5, by Mary Shelley
This year as Halloween approaches we find ourselves facing a terror that surpasses the usual seasonal frights of Michael Myers, werewolves, ghosts, poltergeist and vampires: the Presidential election season.
For many of us, the shocks we have received are akin to the horror that Dr. Frankenstein felt about the creature he had created. We've watched with revulsion as our modern-day monster of incivility, bullying, intimidation and hatred has opened its eye and been unleashed upon our nation.
To tip, or not to tip: that is the question.
Whether 'tis better in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outraged vendors,
Or simply to bite the bullet and shell out a sea of cash.
~ Parody of Hamlet's Famous Soliloquy
Of all the etiquette topics that crop up in our lives tipping is one of the most frustrating and confusing. And we Americans seem to have created this tangled web. Many countries, such as Japan and Brazil, do not observe this custom; but it should be noted that some countries that do not observe tipping, per se, do build into their prices a gratuity. Likewise, tipping in the U.K. is not as widespread as in the U.S., although American tourists are apparently influencing tipping patterns there.
With this ring I thee wed
and with all that I am
and with all that I have
I honor you
The exchange of wedding bands during the marriage ceremony is another highlight that is at once joyful and solemn, and much anticipated by all, especially the bride and groom. The ring having no beginning and no end symbolizes the continuous and endless commitment that the bride and groom are making to each other. The rings are meant to be worn forever as a symbol of that commitment and to make known to the world that such a commitment has been made.
And, as with all thing connected to the wedding ceremony, there is etiquette to observe in the ceremonial exchange of wedding bands.
“Ladies and gentlemen,
I’m sorry to drag you from your delicious desserts.
Uh, there are just one or two little things I feel I should say as best man.
This is only the second time I’ve ever been a best man.
I hope I did the job alright that time.
The couple in question are, at least, still talking to me.
Unfortunately, they’re not actually talking to each other
– the divorce came through a couple of months ago.
But I’m sure it had absolutely nothing to do with me.
Apparently, Paula knew that Pierce had slept with her younger sister
before I mentioned it in the speech.
The fact that he slept with her mother came as a surprise,
but, um, I think was incidental to the nightmare of recrimination
and, um, violence that became their two-day marriage.
Anyway, enough of that! Um, my job today is to talk about Angus,
and there are no skeletons in his cupboard. Or...so I thought.
I’ll come on to that in a minute. I just would like to say this:
Um. I am, as ever, in, uh, bewildered awe of anyone who makes
this kind of commitment that Angus and Laura have made today.
I know I couldn’t do it and, uh, I think it’s wonderful they can.
So, anyway, back to Angus and those sheep!
So, ladies and gentleman, if you don’t…
raise your glasses…uh…the adorable couple!”
~Hugh Grant as Charles in Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994)
Toasts are a highlight of the wedding celebration, both at the rehearsal dinner-- where they are more free-form, anecdotal and often hilarious -- and the reception, where they are more scripted, brief and well-planned. But because a toast is carefully prepared and rehearsed does not mean it cannot be witty and entertaining. Brilliant toasts have been known to prompt tears of sentiment, nostalgia and laughter and add truly memorable moments to a wedding celebration. Some couples tape their toasts for posterity, which I think is a great idea.
"Here come the lovers, full of joy and mirth."
(Enter lovers Lysander, Demetrius, Hermia, And Helena)
~ Thesius, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Act 5, Scene 1
William Shakespeare seemed to find joy in double weddings, as he wrote about them at least thrice, in A Midsummer Night's Dream, Much Ado About Nothing and Twelfth Night. A double wedding also was the focus of the 1937 romantic film comedy, Double Wedding, starring William Powell and Myrna Loy of the Thin Man movie series fame. And remember the achingly romantic double wedding in Pride and Prejudice?
Still from the "His Love Makes Me Beautiful" scene
from the 1968 movie, Funny Girl,
starring Barbra Streisand,
produced by Ray Stark, directed by William Wyler
and distributed by Columbia Pictures
When Barbra Streisand performed her famous Ziegfeld Follies scene from Funny Girl back in 1968, audiences found a pregnant bride a shocking -- and at the same time an amusing -- idea, even though the movie scene was set in the 1930s, where a real pregnant bride would have been even more shocking and maybe not quite so amusing. And, historically, rather than escorting his daughter down the aisle to meet her groom, the role of the father of an unwed pregnant daughter was to oversee the proverbial -- or actual -- shotgun wedding.
"Voting is a civic sacrament."
~ The Rev. Theodore M. Hesburgh
According to an article in The Atlantic, the right to vote is mentioned five times in the Constitution of the United States, more than any other right, including the rights to "the freedom of speech," the "free exercise" of religion, "to keep and bear Arms," or "unreasonable searches and seizures." Yet there is strong disagreement among experts -- including elected officials, Constitutional scholars and Supreme Court Justices -- whether the Constitution grants the right to vote or rather implies that it is merely a privilege. But if the right to vote -- and not the privilege to vote -- is mentioned five times, in those words, it seems pretty iron-clad to me that it is indeed a right and not merely a privilege. I decided to check.
“Women who accuse men, particularly powerful men, of harassment
are often confronted with the reality of the men’s sense
that they are more important than women, as a group.”
― Anita Hill, Speaking Truth to Power
Twenty-five years ago, Anita Hill, a distinguished Yale Law School graduate and Washington D.C. attorney, accused a powerful man, Judge Clarence Thomas, who had just been nominated by President George H.W. Bush to the Supreme Court of the United States, of sexual harassment when she reported to him a decade earlier at both the U.S. Department of Education's Office for Civil Rights and the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC). The accusation reportedly was made privately and dismissed; but a leak to the media prompted Ms. Hill to be called to testify before the Senate Judiciary Committee's confirmation hearing.
"Civility is not not saying negative or harsh things.
It is not the absence of critical analysis.
It is the manner in which we are sharing
this territorial freedom of political discussion.
If our discourse is yelled and screamed
and interrupted and patronized, that's uncivil."
~ Richard Dreyfuss, Actor, Civics Education Innovator
Jeanne Nelson 